genkivideogames
Abril
2008
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Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Instructions for use:
1. Approach painted feet at a steady but sensible speed.
2. Slow down just as you reach painted feet.
3. Carefully place your feet on painted feet.
4. Look left. Look right. Listen.
5. If clear, proceed in an orderly manner.
A pair of painted feet in the middle of the road. Not much good if a lorry is approaching from behind.
The streets of Osaka are now safer thanks to these helpful feet.
Saturday, April 12, 2008
Bored of Buddhism?
Shying away from Shintoism?
Well fear God not because there's a new kid on the block - and his initials are JC.
Take a stroll down your street and He'll soon give you a sign - a sign in the form of a cross - a cross standing tall and proud, taller and prouder than the omnipresent TV aerials which compete daily for heavenly space.
And don't forget - JC's signal is the strongest in town - and he's broadcasting to you on a wavelength different to that of NHK.
JC's churches in Japan all feature their very own non-authentic stained glass windows, placed religiously behind regular wire-mesh windows to give you the best possible ethereal experience.
JC's doors are always open, come breakfast, lunch or dinner.
And if you're worried about the culinary side of Christianity in Japan, then hold it right there - it's not all holy bread and red wine. Attend a sermon here and you'll be happily served a starter of seared serendipity, a main of marinated miracle and a dessert of delicately roasted religious doctrine (a side dish of sanctification is optional).
So don't delay. Meet JC today. He's waiting for your prayer.
Saturday, April 05, 2008
In Japan, the appearance of the pretty pink petals means that public parks up and down the archipelago will be packed with party people partying till they go positively potty. Except in Osaka.
This year, it's all gone a bit wrong.
When the authorities planted the seeds for the blossoms a few months back, little did they know that a mix-up of astronomical proportions had been made.
It was only when the buds bloomed last week that they realised they'd planted the wrong seeds. So this year there are no pink blossoms in Osaka. Only yellow ones.
For the first time since hanami (blossom viewing) was invented 22 years ago, the people of Osaka are faced with having to postpone their parties.
Last Tuesday, on the official day of blooming, people awoke expecting to see their city awash in a beautiful sea of pink. Instead they were faced with this....
Sadly, they're nowhere near being anything like pink.
Farmers across the city are hurriedly planting new seeds in the hope that little pink cherry blossoms will bloom later this month, but inside their heads they know it's too late.
A farmer on a miniature tractor works in vain for the people of Osaka.
Some cherry blossom plants are just beginning to show, but they won't be ready until at least December....
At the same time last year, this park was filled with people drinking lots of beer and sake while enjoying the cherry blossoms and lots of beer and sake....
....but now it stands empty because everything has turned yellow.
Some people have taken to partying under pink potted plants, but it's just not the same....
A potted plant is clearly no substitute for the real thing.
Is THIS the man responsible for the shambles?
Probably not.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
A recent trip to my local food-selling establishment had this shiny selection on sale for 5,000 yen (about 25 British quids), each piece of fruit with its own protective padding to stop it getting damaged should it be necessary to use it as an offensive weapon.
For some people, the prohibitive cost of fruit here means forgoing its healthy benefits.
However, if you're prepared to look around a bit, you can find some real bargains. Like this rather inviting selection of oranges I stumbled upon recently, which turned out to make a really tasty fruit salad - once I'd picked out the grit of course....
Sunday, March 23, 2008
But no one came.
Jump on a train heading east out of Osaka and in just over 30 minutes you'll come to Otsu, a city built 20 years ago at the southern end of Lake Biwa.
But when they finished building it, no one went to live there.
So now it stands deserted, inhabited only by the cold winds that blow in from Lake Biwa. Like a great sports stadium, Otsu has a capacity of 100,000 - but an attendance of zero.
Taxi drivers outside the station ponder what has become known as The Great Otsu Planning Fiasco.....
Trains stop at Otsu Station, but no one gets off....
or on....
It's a city of deserted streets....
....a city of unattended lemons....
.....a city of unimaginatively named buildings....
....of playgrounds not full of children....
....a place where electronics retail giant Yodobashi Camera opened a smaller-than-usual store to adequately cope with the lack of customers....
....a city with evidence of alien visitations. These mysterious Quorn Circles are of particular interest to scientists.
An Otsu noticeboard lists upcoming events that will be attended by no one.
Here's a photo of the annual Otsu Festival of Light in full swing....
An Otsu bus timetable clearly shows that if you arrive at this bus stop at 7.57, you're going to be in for a bit of a wait....
.....as for Sundays, best bring a sleeping bag and a good book....
In a country well known for its crowded urban areas, Otsu may come as a pleasant surprise. It may also leave you feeling a tad spooked.
Saturday, March 15, 2008
So here's one I've created for people of a similar disposition.
Simply print off the two almost identical pictures - one of an American school bus, the other of a Japanese school bus.
Then, using your powers of observation, circle the 748 differences (625 if using a non-colour printer).
Good luck!
Saturday, March 08, 2008
After picking grains of it out of their muesli, they would've gone outside to see their car covered in the brown stuff.
Having got to work and brushed their desk down, they might've had a conversation with a colleague that went something like this:
A-san: Did you see the sand?
B-san: Yes.
A-san: Lunch is soon.
It got everywhere - in people's hair, in their eyes, it even got into some people's brains.
The foul-smelling finger of blame is being pointed at China, already in Japan's bad books following their alleged foray into the unprofitable market of poisoned dumplings.
It seems that the sand may have blown in from the Gobi desert, a claim backed up by this recent photo of the desert which clearly shows that all the sand has been blown away, leaving only the concrete beneath....
Prime Minister Fukuda talks tough....

Mr Fukuda continues to mystify political commentators who can't for the life of them work out why he needs to lick ice creams while making speeches.
Sunday, March 02, 2008
I often get emails asking whether any new lines have opened recently on Osaka's subway system. The answer to the question is "yes", though the line isn't that new because it didn't open recently.
The newest line on the system is the Imazatosuji Line, which opened in December, 2006. Judging by the spotless nature of the trains and stations, one could easily be led to believe it opened yesterday. But it didn't.
This man alone is responsible for the stunningly good condition of the line's entire fleet of trains and all 11 stations....
The Imazatosuji Line is the first to have barriers installed on the platforms to prevent depressed salarymen falling forward onto the track just as a train arrives at high speed....
The very latest computer technology has been utilised to ensure the perfect alignment of the barriers with the train doors, allowing for the effortless movement of passengers from carriage to platform and vice versa and then vice versa again if necessary....
New carriages, new seats and new passengers....
Architects who are also good at art were called in to design the stations....
However, in recent months there's been a significant increase in chatter in Osaka-based internet chatrooms due to the mysterious appearance of used PET bottles cut in half and stuck upside down on the ceilings of some stations along the line....
Is this art? Or is it just half an upside-down PET bottle taped to the ceiling?
Or possibly something altogether more sinister....
Sunday, February 24, 2008
Like most people, I often wake up in the middle of the night thinking about what kind of corporate exhibition I might like to put on in a large convention centre.
Deep down, I know that whether it's an exhibition showing off the virtues of sushi, or an event selling a variety of miniature shrines, or even a get together of people marketing gently scented tatami mats, I'll need people in costumes to give demonstrations, or to just lie on the product in a sexy way.
So imagine my delight when I happened upon the aptly named Bendy, a catalogue full of lovely ladies (and one man) dressed in a variety of sensible clothing.
Bendy is your number one stop for all your exhibition needs.
Could this woman sell YOUR product?
The catalogue consists of 39 lady pages. Page 40 shows a man in a number of blazers with a perfectly poised fist and smile....
Sunday, February 17, 2008
That's right, the male member has now entered the mushrooming market of beauty care. So guys, if your schlong has lost its sheen, if your equipment needs exfoliating, or if you simply want some cream rubbed into it, then this new clinic is the place for you.
A range of treatments are available.

A beauty clinic to make your nob look beautiful again.
And after it's been given the once over, or even the twice over, you'll be able to enter this establishment bulging with confidence and with a twinkle in your eye....
Saturday, February 09, 2008
As most people know, in Japan it's a one way street, with the women buying choco for the men. Exactly one month later, on White Day, the men buy cookies for the women, and exactly one month after that, on Happy Day, the choco and cookie companies count their massive profits.
But first up it's Valentine's Day. Supermarkets and convenience stores are currently packed to the rafters with choco of every shape, size, taste and price.
The names of the choco can be interesting too. Should any woman want to leave the man of her dreams in no doubt as to her desired intentions, she can message him through the choco..........
For example, she might very well have the
....in which case she'll probably be wanting some hanky
....you never know, she might even want her

Boobs Fondled - a ridiculous name for a bar of choco
Saturday, February 02, 2008
Greenpeace's ship has now returned to base having spent several weeks doing its best to disrupt the expedition.
The Japanese fleet plans to kill about 900 minke whales and 50 fin whales by mid-April for what it says is a scientific research programme.
Back in Japan, the laboratory awaits....
The test tubes are under the fancy napkins.
And the scientists are also looking forward to getting down to work....

A Japanese chef scientist adds the final touches chemical in a bid to see whether whale blubber can be used in desserts plasma television screens.
According to this website, the Japanese government claim to have "...scientific proof that commercial whaling of certain species would not have a negative effect on the species as a whole."
But try telling that to the whales....
The ongoing research is designed to determine things such as population numbers.
But there is growing evidence that the whales are staging a fightback....
Some people believe that soon after the expedition returns from the Antarctic in April, the whales will quickly find themselves back between the burger buns.

Whale burgers - too cute to eat?
aliental
ebcb
an Englishman...
Brady Bunch
E-Square diary
Lovely Days
Maritime Musician
Mikan Moblog
Miwako
Nana
Road to Damascus
Robskills
The Editors
Tokyo Girl


I'm moving my blogs to my webspace, at phiine.com
Please update your bookmark for this blog to http://www.phiine.com/blogs/nihon
Phil 4:34 AM 0 Comments
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[There's a Hong Kong blog now! I'm about 2 weeks behind with it, but working hard to catch up
And don't forget the pictures on Flickr too.]
Phil 10:59 PM 0 Comments
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The 7 hours at the hotel passed quickly, as expected! But it was a comfortable night anyway, and we left the next morning in good spirits. The organisation at the hotel was really good, and we got bussed back to the airport efficiently. As we were pulling out of the hotel car park we ironically saw a famous symbol of Japan for the first time ever - the rising sun, exactly as you'd imagine it: an oversized glowing fiery red disc appearing in the hazy distance behind some small pines.
The flight got underway on time, and we were treated to some great views of Japan all the way from Tokyo down to Kyushu, before the clouds won out. This included the most spectacular view ever of another great Japanese symbol, Mount Fuji, standing magnificently alone on the vast Kanto plain, surrounded by wispy white clouds. We flew almost directly over it and could see it's brown bare flanks and the dreadful crater. Goodbye Japan; we will certainly never forget you!
Phil 9:48 PM 0 Comments
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When I said "Later" I didn't mean it to be quite so long - sorry! So, what did we do...I'll give you a brief summary in this post (which I've back dated just for tidiness). The first night in Tokyo we went down to Ginza and had a look around a bit for old times sake. We ended up eating and drinking at the Lion beer hall, which was somewhere we'd always wanted to go. Things are a bit overpriced there, but it's still worth it for the atmosphere and the decor.The next day was quite warm and humid, a great day to hear the familiar shrill sound of the cicadas. There seemed to be hundreds of them in the trees of the shrine dedicated to Confucius, near Ochanomizu, where we went first.
For lunch we went to a very old soba shop, Yabu Soba in Kanda (virtually behind the Green Hotel of Colin-and-Phil-in-Tokyo fame!) which is apparently almost legendary. It's a beautiful place, still in the same family after 6 generations. The husband and wife behind the counter make a very interesting team, with their chaotic but very efficient system of keeping track of orders, which the wife literally sings out to the kitchen staff. The soba was excellent by the way!
After that we went down to Tokyo station and looked around the Marunouchi building, and then eventually made it across to Harajuku and Omotesando. We had a crepe and went in some shops, including ones in the newish Omotesando Hills shopping centre. It's actually quite cool I suppose, with the interior based around a gradually ascending spiral hill. But there didn't seem to be many very good shops, to just...buy stuff in. And I still prefer the old apartments that were rather callously pulled down. It's good to see they left one of them standing at least.
That night we went to one of the small yakitori shops almost under the railway tracks at Yurakucho - somewhere else we'd never got around to going back in 2002-3. That was a great experience, very atmospheric, with, of course,plenty of delicious food - a good memory of Japan to take away.The next day didn't provide so many good memories. We took a taxi the couple of minutes to TCAT, and then a bus out to Narita (perhaps the most awkward to access major city airport in the world? Bar Gatwick maybe). So far so good. Check-in early, have a final set lunch, get to the gate with plenty of time to spare for boarding at 3:20pm...only to wait beyond the boarding time...and wait...and wait some more. Soon, the dreaded recursive announcements along the lines of "we'll make another announcement in 15 minutes" began, and so did the familiar sinking feeling. Eventually it was: "Flights to Hong Kong are all suspended at the moment due to bad weather [a typhoon] so your flight maybe cancelled; we're making arrangments for a hotel and transport if this should happen". It seemed we wouldn't escape Japan so easily!
The flight was confirmed cancelled just before 5, but it took until well after 9 to get to the hotel. That interlude contained a lot of very badly organised parts which I can't really go into too much here (but briefly, because I just can't resist it: sorting people out to go back through immigration by (after the Japanese customers had lined up separately, first, ahem, going one-by-one through a vast stack of exit-cards reading out names; assigning people to hotels without writing down names, and then much later on having a complete free-for-all and re-assigning people who could fight through the scrum with their boarding pass; announcements of departing shuttle buses made not using the PA system but by a diminuative ANA representative in a tiny voice to a hall full of hundreds of people...)We were assigned to "the Hilton". However, the sinking
feeling came back when our bus sailed past the Narita Airport Hilton and onto the expressway for Tokyo. Rumours flew around the bus - we were being taken to the Tokyo Hilton in Shinjuku, the opposite side of the sprawling metropolis; it would take another hour and a half to get there, and none of us had eaten, drank or even had a chance to use the toilet for hours. There was a glimmer of hope as someone managed to produce a bag of mixed nuts which were duly passed around. Time ticked by, and it really did look like Shinjuku for a while, but then the bus cut off at the Disneyland exit and we eventually arrived at the Tokyo Bay Hilton, where a huge (by any country's standards) room with a harbour view, tickets for a pretty decent dinner buffet and a free international call awaited us. Shame we could only enjoy the hotel for 7 hours, before our 5am bus back to the rescheduled flight departed...
Phil 4:03 AM 1 Comments
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And we are here in Hong Kong now, as of yesterday...I'll have to write a longer entry later to explain all that happened!
Phil 11:41 PM 0 Comments
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Hi - we're here in Tokyo - ah the big city! Got here no problem, and as a bonus we got to ride on one of the ANA Pikachu planes again, upstairs again (just like old times Colin, except the stewardesses weren't so crazy!). We managed to lug our lead cases to the Hotel Kitcho - I literally almost didn't make it up the many many flights of stairs at Ningyocho station. Out to find some food soon.
(PS - thanks for the well wishing emails everyone!)
Phil 3:03 AM 6 Comments
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Hi again...well we're sitting in a very minimal apartment at the moment, having got rid of virtually all our worldy possessions this morning. Our boxes went off OK on Saturday too - the postman brought portable scales, tape measure, price calculation booklets...why do they need an actual post office really?
So now we just wait for our net-ordered pizza to arrive and then we have the rest of the day to get the place clean and finish packing our suitcases. Only 4 more hours of internet access left today, so I think this will be my last ever post from Hokkaido. Goodbye to the Snow Country!
Phil 8:19 PM 1 Comments
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The 3rd and final fireworks tonight were again very impressive. The weather has been really nice for each one which is great. Some good final memories to take out of Japan.
I taught my last ever lesson this morning. Quite an auspicious occasion I suppose, although as is often the case I didn't really feel the reality of it at the time.
We also got rid of a few more items today (thanks Miwa!) so the place is thinning out.
We've literally just finished sealing up our boxes which will be sent off on a slow boat to China tomorrow afternoon. I called and found out that the post office will pick them up for us too, so I don't have to worry about lugging four 20 kilo boxes through the streets, or better still the look on the taxi driver's face as I throw them into his back seat...! I'm wondering what they'll do when they come - do they have a portable scales to weigh them and calculate the cost? Or can they do it by feel alone? Let's see..!
Phil 7:45 AM 0 Comments
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As you might know, we're saying goodbye to Japan very soon...in exactly a week in fact. So we've been very very busy doing all the pre-saying goodbye kind of things that one needs to do...cleaning up, throwing away, advertising and selling, going out for goodbye lunches and parties...as well as finishing off a little work and paying final bills...the list goes on so I won't bore you with too many details!
There'll be a blackout without internet access for about 24 hours from next Monday: I'm not quite sure how I'll cope! Then next Tuesday we're off to Tokyo for a couple of nights where I'll be able to check emails and post again.
Blogwise, I think I'll just keep this blog sitting here for a while as a reminder of how things were. I might back it up to a different URL too. And then, it's "what do you see (Hong Kong)?" (working title of course). Funnily enough Tokyo Girl is also making the great transition out of Japan at about the same time as us.
Phil 10:32 PM 0 Comments
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A post about other blogs today - I wanted to draw attention to a few of the sites in my right-column:
I've been reading the newish blog on the BBC, called The Editors recently - sounds a bit dull maybe, but it actually gives an interesting and surprisingly transparent insight into how the BBC runs, including a recent post titled Different Views about how BBC News 24 and BBC World take quite different angles on the same story.
Another post discussed how blogging influences other more traditional media these days and how the BBC "can now know what you [the audience] are talking about and interested in without you ever telling us..." (see Daniel Pearl's "We're watching you"). So I'm going to test it. This is basically a post about the BBC's post about reading other people's posts, so let's hope they find it...Dave is going strong on his blog (recently retitled to "Crater-strewn Dirt Track to Damascus") and doing a great job of gathering together relevant articles about the whole Israel / Lebanon / Syria / Iran... situation in that part of the Middle East as well as providing an excellent picture of how it's affecting every day life (see his July 19th post for that).
And my oldest friend Charles has got a blog and a web-presence at last! He's working on a ferry between Hull and Zeebrugge for a few weeks and has some good stories over at Maritime Musician.
It all makes my stories of abandoned gorillas, weather and moving sales seem a bit bland. Oh well, I do the best I can.
Phil 10:36 PM 1 Comments
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This is a very sad post to write. It tells poignantly of the state of affairs in this modern world we live in; a world of disposability and instant gratification.
In the picture below, there's a small dark object, barely visible, dwarfed by the neighbouring "mansion" block and left out with the rubbish:
What could it be? The truth is somehow close to heartbreaking...
As I write this, it's starting to rain; huge ominous summer-storm drops inexorably darkening the pavements. The thought of that poor unwanted gorilla, turning soggy, left perhaps to moulder for days, is almost too much to bear.
Phil 11:18 PM 2 Comments
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Heat! Warmth! Yesterday the weather finally got its act together, and it reached 29C here in Sapporo (warmest so far this year). And it's surprisingly humid too, for Hokkaido. I'm not complaining (for once, I hear you all yelling)! Unfortunately the weather forecast is suggesting that from here on the weather will "collapse"...as long as it holds out for the first of the 3 big Sapporo Toyohira River fireworks displays, which happens tonight. It's almost 2 years since I last properly saw the displays. Last year I missed all but the last few minutes of all of them (work, pah).Anyway, it's quite hard to write such mundane things when such un-mundane and ridiculous things are going on in the Middle East. Dave, I'm thinking of you over there.
Phil 5:11 PM 1 Comments
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FOR SALE!!
This probably won't be much use to most readers, but if anyone is in the Sapporo area (or knows someone who might be interested!), please check out what we have for sale at: http://www.phiine.com/forsale.
Thanks!!
Phil 11:36 PM 0 Comments
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Today, being 7th July, is one of the dates of tanabata - a Japanese star festival, derived from a Chinese one. There are many nice old traditions that are practiced all over the country, including decorating bamboo which is often then floated on a river or burned, dressing up in yukata, making paper cranes...
Here, and in some other cities such as Sendai, they celebrate it on August 8th (which is the 7th of the 7th month on the old lunar calendar). So today is nothing at all here actually. Just thought I'd tell you anyway!
Phil 7:16 AM 1 Comments
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So, quite disconcerting really. As I'm sure you all know, this morning a crazed leader launched a rocket.And North Korea launched a few too!!! Harharhar! Boom boom! ! (that's "boom! boom!" as in Basil Brush's catchphrase)
Ahem. No seriously though, obviously the NK thing is a bit dodgy and hopefully will get sorted out soon, in a diplomatic way. Even at times such as this though the potential for a joke like that is just too great to resist. Too much time on my hands? I'm sure. Should take these things more seriously? Undoubtedly.
Sorry.
Phil 5:05 AM 4 Comments
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| Antes que nada | Un poco de gramática | Pronunciación | Saludos y expresiones útiles | Enlaces, agradecimientos y otras yerbas | JAPhispa en la prensa |
| LECCIONES | APÉNDICES |
|---|---|
| 1. Mucho gusto 2. ¿Cuánto es? 3. La casa de Prudencio 4. ¿Qué hora es? 5. Telefoneando a Midori 6. ¿Te gusta el café? 7. Un fin de semana 8. Dando y recibiendo 9. En el aeropuerto |
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| VOCABULARIO |
Estas páginas fueron perpetradas por Eduardo López Herrero, eduardo@gol.com
Se ven bien con Explorer, pero mejor con Netscape.
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